old enough to know better, young enough not to care
so i figured maybe it was time to update this. a lot of things are happening in my life, most of which i have no control over and the other half are not finalized... so ya i'll keep most of them to myself. i decided that i'm the eternal pessimist until i see something i don't believe it, yep i'd have made jesus put my hands in his nail holes too. i need to be more excited about things in my life, however i can't see how things are getting sooo much better.... yet.
i really liked horsebacking riding, it was nice to be outside, it felt like home. except all the times we had to go fast and then it felt like death, don't ask. it was the cutest thing a 6 or 9 month old boy was petting a baby calf. it hit me hard, i can't imagine growing up without that or a little girl not having a kitty. that breaks my heart. it causes me to wonder if that's what i want for my kids, i love open spaces, but i'm not sure that's what i want... ya know?
being home has made me realize one thing, i'm not as mature as i had this imagine that i was. i don't really know what i'm doing with my life, and i don't really live on my own and i'm still as much as i try to hide from it daddy's little spoiled girl. i reflected on high school today and realized how spoiled i was/am i went to the dominican, got allowance till i was in gr. 12, a car, my gas paid for and i got to go to school in BC free. and now once again my daddy is paying for me to go to mexico and i'm soo spoiled that i'm not even excited "meh i've been there already". isn't that pathetic. it scares me cause i wonder if i can do it on my own, i think that's the pain in becoming dependent on others. the moral of the story is that no matter how many important things i do at work, at the end of the day i come home, take my hair down, put on my hoodie and eat the supper that my mom made for me.
as a side note, i had some things to tell ppl. i talked to ray and we talked about getting together a sunday afternoon and playing floor hockey. let me know if you're interested. i think i'd be awsome and a good workout. and i'll be working in winkler all next week and i get lunch at 12-12:30 so anyway wanted to "do lunch", let me know, i've been having an itch for subway or mcdonalds.
i really liked horsebacking riding, it was nice to be outside, it felt like home. except all the times we had to go fast and then it felt like death, don't ask. it was the cutest thing a 6 or 9 month old boy was petting a baby calf. it hit me hard, i can't imagine growing up without that or a little girl not having a kitty. that breaks my heart. it causes me to wonder if that's what i want for my kids, i love open spaces, but i'm not sure that's what i want... ya know?
being home has made me realize one thing, i'm not as mature as i had this imagine that i was. i don't really know what i'm doing with my life, and i don't really live on my own and i'm still as much as i try to hide from it daddy's little spoiled girl. i reflected on high school today and realized how spoiled i was/am i went to the dominican, got allowance till i was in gr. 12, a car, my gas paid for and i got to go to school in BC free. and now once again my daddy is paying for me to go to mexico and i'm soo spoiled that i'm not even excited "meh i've been there already". isn't that pathetic. it scares me cause i wonder if i can do it on my own, i think that's the pain in becoming dependent on others. the moral of the story is that no matter how many important things i do at work, at the end of the day i come home, take my hair down, put on my hoodie and eat the supper that my mom made for me.
as a side note, i had some things to tell ppl. i talked to ray and we talked about getting together a sunday afternoon and playing floor hockey. let me know if you're interested. i think i'd be awsome and a good workout. and i'll be working in winkler all next week and i get lunch at 12-12:30 so anyway wanted to "do lunch", let me know, i've been having an itch for subway or mcdonalds.
posted by Cherise at 6:49 PM
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